fORgiVeNeSS...

two friends
were walking
through the desert
During some point of the
journey they had an
argument, and one friend
slapped the other one
in the face.
The one who got slapped
was hurt, but without
saying anything,
wrote in the sand:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.

They kept on walking
until they found an oasis,
where they decided
to take a bath.
The one who had been
slapped got stuck in the
mire and started drowning,
but the friend saved him.
After he recovered from
the near drowning,
he wrote on a stone:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND

SAVED MY LIFE.

The friend who had slapped
and saved his best friend
asked him, "After I hurt you,
you wrote in the sand and now,
you write on

a stone, why?"

The other friend replied

minute to find a special

"When someone hurts us
we should write it down

in sand where winds of

forgiveness can erase it away.

But, when someone does

something good for us,

we must engrave it in stone

where no wind

can ever erase it."

LEARN TO WRITE

YOUR HURTS IN

THE SAND AND TO

CARVE YOUR

BENEFITS IN STONE.

They say it takes a

person, an hour to

appreciate them, a day

to love them, but then

an entire life

to forget them.

yuhhhuuuuu...

one of the pics di Oceanside...

Monday agaaiiinnnn, another week to gooooo... wiken kmaren full... full acaranya, but it was full of fun too... Jumat malem bisa ktemuan ama bokap nyokap di airport, even cuman bentar banget... less than 3 hours, but it's better than nothing, huhuhuhu... trus sabtu paginya lanjut ke Oceanside, bwat station of the cross bareng smua yg dari LA, OC, n San Bernandino... dari Oceanside lanjut ke San Diego, gilaaaaaa... makan buffet pada buassss gitu mannn, parahhhnyaaa... hehehhe.. trus pulang n tepar... minggu ke greja, lanjut workshop n farewell Chanuka...

hmmm... another amazing one yg harus pegi.. even kliatannya cuman ke Oregon, but stillll... yahhhh, meskipun gw jg ga gitu deket ama Chan, but gw ngerasa kehilangan ajah... kayak yg gw dah blg personally ke dia... tapi bener" dehhh gw salut bgt ama dia, kmaren gw liat banget waktu dia didoain rame" jadi lebi hepiii karena smua ngedukung perjalanan dia ke depan... bener" even jauh di mata, tapi deket di hatiiii... saaaahhh... satu roh juga kata Kevin.. dan gw slalu seneng tapi jg sedihhh Chan, denger loe slalu ngomong ama gw... "Stef, kita ke surganya barengan.. kita ke surga barengan.." gw ga tau dehhh loe dah brapa kaliiiii ngomong kayak gitu, tapi di situ gw slalu ngerasa sediiiiihhh banget.. sediihhh karena itu artinya loe dah harus cabut ke Oregon, dan i think kmaren dah yg trakhir dehhh loe ngmg gituuu... tapi gw jg seneng, gw berasa kalo loe tuhhh bner" care banget sama orang laen... dan thats true... sapa siyh yang ga bisa liat Tuhan lewat loe Chan?? lewat situ juga gw bisa liat gimana loe bener" nganggep setiap orang ituh sodara loe... and thats also true... we are all brothers n sisters in Christ...

Praise God gw bole kenal loe, gw bole blajar dari loe jugaaa... how to be a servant that He wants... humility, obedience, and also ur dedication to serve wherever He wants u to go... gimana dalam sgala keadaan juga loe tetep siap melayani Tuhan... hmmm yahhh good luck in the new place dehhh... Tuhan memberkati!!

another blessing....

Just wanna praise God for what He's done for me... that He's given His only begotten Son, and His "beloved son" for me... thanks Lord for giving me the special person in my life now.. ga pnah nemuin siyh orang yg bisa gw sayang bgt n satu"nya yg tau the biggest secret in my life kayak Willy... i just don't know why he loves me and accepts me as i am... maaaaaannn, i'm just wondering ajah... apa bagusnya aku yaahhhh, hmmm... *bingung mode on*

padahal bukannya kalo couple sama" Sanguine rada susah digabungnya yaaahhh... well, it's ok.. so far it works out koq... :P

tengkiuuuuu Wil... for everything, smua hal yg uda qta share bareng... it's just amazing klo kamu masi bisa sabar... n esp. i'm still wondering how come u still love me as i am even u know what's going on with me now... apa aku masi layak kamu sayang??? hmmmm.... actully, i don't think so... but thanks God if u do...

hopefully... this is gonna be the everlasting one... that He has prepared for u and me... may He bless this relationship always until the end of time...

nice things....

Wowwwww...
it was just cool.... how come there were 2 amazing people emailed me today.... when i just woke up and checked my yahoo inbox, they really surprised me... with their emails... well i am so blessed to have u guys in my life, huhuhu... that u still think i'm a very good friend for u... so niceeeee... well frankly i'm glad that even we're apart, there are 2 nice people remembering me... and i'm just proud to be one of the GYLC community... mannnn, one of them was the best guy in the whole group... ;) and the other was the best ambassador in our team...the best leaders that i know actually... i love South Africa group, yaaaaaaaaayyy... BUS 6!!! Acuna Matataaaaaaa... :))

Huhuuu...
banyak bangeeettt hal yg mondar mandir di kepala gw... bikin pusink.... mana ngantuuuukkkk bgt lagiii, tadi bangun pagi gituu... had to do something siyh, skrg dah pengen merem matanyaaa... tapi ga mungkinnnn, ada pr n project banyaaakkk aje bwat besok... hhmmm i think salah ambil kelas niyh, sok" mo jadi anaq honors program, tp kayaknya ga cocok deh gw... hehehehhe... yahhh gini lahhh nasib org pemalas... :P

Mikeee.... tengkiuuu dah nemenin gw always, suka nelp" disaat gw sbenernya butuh temen ngobrol... but i don't know... i couldn't tell u these things, lots of stuff keep coming, jd gw sendiri bingung mesti ngapainnnnn n critanya gimanaaaaa... huhuhuhu....

duuhhh duuhhh...

Ampun Tuhaaannn...
kalo caranya dimurnikan kayak gini.. lama" bisa ga kuat niyhhhh... kmaren bermasalah, skarang bermasalah lagi... dah kena parking violation gara" ga parkir di employee parking... maaaaaannnn, how come?? tiap hari harus kayak gini, ktemu masalah" baru yang ga pernah ada abisnya, padahal yg kmaren" ajah belom kelar...

I really don't know what to do or where to run and hide, but I know that I really need strength, patience and wisdom... I need to survive...

nway... HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY everybody!!
GB!

sPRing bREaK....

Wuiiihhhh.. ga berasa bgt nih udah hari Kamis.... emang slalu gituuuu yaaahh, kalo libur pasti berasanya cepet bgt... tadinya aku pikir bakalan bosen spring break ga kmana".. tapi ternyataaa... untung ajah ga kmana", kalo pegi" pasti urusan yg ga keurus dan bakalan bikin lebih repot lagi ntar"nyaaa...

once agaiiinnn... mo bilang that everything happens for a reason... kalo tadinya rencana spring break mo ktemuan ama bokap nyokap di NY, eeehhh tiba" bisa batal karena mereka ga dapet tiket... dapet tiketnya malah masi minggu depan gt... awal"nya bt bgt.. gw dah kangeeennn aja gt ama bonyok, trus rencana bisa ktemu batal lagiiii... cumannn ternyata hari Selasa pagi gw kayak diingetin ajaaa... misalnya gw bisa pegi ke NY, ktemuan n jalan" ama nyokap.. i don't think gw jg bakalan seneng kayak gimana gituuu.. since Willy disini juga ketimpa musibah.. soooo... bgitu inget, kayaknya meskipun tadinya sedih ga ktemu bonyok, akhirnya aku bersyukur ajah soalnya jadi bisa nemenin Willy...

thenn.. kayaknya slama 2 hari ini, Selasa n Rabu... waktunya juga uda abis bwat nemenin Devi ngurusin skul n bank.. ama ngurusin bank account aku yg masi ga kelar".. ama kerja sore sperti byasa... ooohh ama hari Senen malemnya juga asik.. bisa surprise-in Raymond yg bday.. seruuu sihhhh, apalagi Joy dah terlatih bwat ngerjain orangg.. =P hehehhe...
well... nway, Devi tuh anaqnya temennya nyokap yg baru pindah ksini dari Florida, since ga betah disana and skrg lagi tinggal ama aku... yahhh jadinya lumayan lahhh ada yg diajakin ngobtol juga kalo dirumahh... hehhhehhehe.. sisa 4 hari ini... dari Kamis sampe Minggu... i have to finish my online quizzes n midterm, project yg mayan bejibun ama PR Math yg uda numpuk jugaaa... i hope smuanya bisa kelar by Monday sihhh.. soalnya next weekend juga dah full, jadinya dah ga ada waktu lagi bwat kerjain smuanyaaaa...

yahhhh gitu dehh sputar my spring break yg cuman stay di Irvine ajaaa... hehhehe... but it's not too bad actually... i enjoy it... apalagi kalo ada yg mo visit gw di Irvine, makin senennnng deh pastinyaaa... hehhehehe... :))

inTeRViEw wiTh GoD...

I dreamed I had an interview with God.

“So you would like to interview me?” God asked.
“If you have the time” I said.
God smiled.
“My time is eternity.”
“What questions do you have in mind for me?”
“What surprises you most about humankind?”

God answered...“That they get bored with childhood,they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again.”
“That they lose their health to make money...and then lose their money to restore their health.”
“That by thinking anxiously about the future,they forget the present,such that they live in neither the present nor the future.”
"That they live as if they will never die,and die as though they had never lived.”

God’s hand took mineand we were silent for a while.And then I asked...
“As a parent, what are some of life’s lessons you want your children to learn?”
“To learn they cannot make anyonelove them. All they can do is let themselves be loved.”
“To learn that it is not good to compare themselves to others.”
“To learn to forgive by practicing forgiveness.”
“To learn that it only takes a few seconds to open profound wounds in those they love, and it can take many years to heal them.”
“To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most,but is one who needs the least.”
“To learn that there are people who love them dearly,but simply have not yet learned how to express or show their feelings.”
“To learn that two people can look at the same thing and see it differently.”
“To learn that it is not enough that they forgive one another, but they must also forgive themselves.”

"Thank you for your time," I said humbly.
"Is there anything else you would like your children to know?"
God smiled and said,“Just know that I am here... always.”

juSt aNoTheR daY...

Yuuuhhhuuuu...
abis kmaren seharian di rumah, akhirnyaaaa... free juga td skul n kerja lg... ooohh well, emang cape siyh, tp disuruh di rumah seharian ga ngapa"in juga lebi ga bangggeeettt dehhh... apalagi harus terbaring di tempat tidur, huhuhuhu...

Hmmm... seneng sih hari ini boleh ngerasain yg namanyaaa... sdikit dibutuhin ama org skitar.. hehehhehe... dari semalem ada ajah yg nelp, even tengah malem nelp or sms... ada yg cuman ngobrol" ga jelas... ada yg minta didoain... ada yg minta ditelp balik, haiyaaaa... yg ini siyh sdikit ga gw anggep, abisnya dah jam 2.30an di sini disuruh telp ke indo.. hehhehe... maaaappp yah yg berasa.. =p sampe malem ini kayaknya ada ajah yg nelp, sms and chatting bwat sharing n nyariin gw.... puji Tuhan dicariin... hehehhe.. ga ngilang koq gw, masi disini" ajah... :)

yahhh gitu siyh sekilas kehidupan friendship yg lg cukup menyenangkannnn....
Tuhan memberkati smuanyaaaa...

nganggurnyaaaaa...

Ga enak juga yahhh rasanya seharian ga ngapa"in... tadi pagi pusiiinnkk bgt, kedinginan.. badan shaking ga brentiii... akhirnya ga bisa bangun deh, n ga masuk skul hari ini.. cuman kerjain online quiz di rumah n telpon" ama maen internet... abisnya cuman ituh yg bisa dikerjain di tempat tidur... keluar kamar cuman makan n mandi... tapi skarang dah mendingan sih... getting better, jadinya bsk dah bisa ngapa"in lagiii dehh... dan yg pasti mesti nyelesein masalah" yg harus dikelarin n to be honest dah males kelarinnya... soalnya slalu bikin gw mo marah" dan ga hepiii ajah ngejalanin hari" ini... ga byasa marah tapi kesannya dipaksa marah, karena orang" yg gw hadepin ga bisa dihadepin baek"...

ooohhh weelllll...
bener yg Bobby bilang... this is life... tough... we have problems to face n that's why we need people to support each other...

sooo.... mo bilang juga THANKS A BUNCH!!!! bwat smuanya yg dah slalu n ga cape"nya... malah makin perhatian n perhatian... kasi support ke gw... trutama tengkiu bwat smuanya yg keep me in prayers... yg bener" ngedukung gw juga bwat bisa berdiri tegak sampe skrg.. :))
luv u all... God bless!!

tOuGh daY...

aHhhhh...
finally gw bisa kelarin satu hari yg sangaaatttt melelahkan... n juga sangat menegangkan... tapi hepiiii juga karena ada satu urusan yg bisa kelar..

kmaren... Wednesday, March 1st... yg juga bertepatan sama Ash Wednesday...
i know that everything happens for a reason and i do believe it... pas hari Rabu ituhh misanya yg di deket" sini paling banyak yah yg di deket rumah gw.. n schedulenya tuh jam 6.30 am, 8.30 am, 12.10 pm n 5 pm... pas gw liat" n pikir berulang"... gw bingung nih either gw ke greja yg jam 6.30 or ga ke greja... karena jam 8:30 gw harus ngurusin court, jam 12.10 gw ada exam, n jam 5 gw harus kerja karena ga ada yg bisa gantiin....

maaaaaaaannn... secara kedagingan gw... gw cape bgt physically karena banyaakkk bgt masalah yg harus diselesein n bener" nyita pikiran, tenaga n terutama waktu tidur gw... well, emg sihhh susah bgt bwat gw tidur before midnight, jadinya yah emg susah juga mo ngatur waktu tidur.. hehehhe.. tapi stelah gw bawa doa jg... gw yakin pasti gw bisa ngejalanin satu hari ituh kalo gw jalan pake kekuatan Tuhan, not my own strength... dan gw senennnggg n bersyukur bgt karena kmaren gw bisa bangun jam 5.40an gt.. beres" n langsung cabut ke greja... dah deg"an bakalan telat, tp ternyata on time bgt deh.. pas gw masuk pas romonya jg baru masuk n lagi bagiin abu... theeennn dari greja jam 7.15an gt gw lgsg ke court... bingung juga sih mo pulang dulu or lgsg ksana.. soalnya deket juga, skitar 10 menit lah paling lama dah nyampe sana... tapi stelah gw pikir" lg, daripada ntar gw deg"an takut telat n sgala macem, yah i decided to go there... nyampe courtnya masi ada waktu stengah jam.. nunggu di depan pintunyaaa... ada perasaan takut, cemas... deg"an di dalem bakalan gimana.. tapi pas gw rasa"in lagiiii, gw tau everything would be fine... i really felt His presence in me that even i know it was challenging, but everything was gonna be okay... jdnya pas gw ngerasa takut, bingung mesti gimana.. tapi gw ngerasa juga ada satu kekuatan yang ada di dalem gw yg mendorong gw bwat terus maju n ga patah semangat...

wahhhh.. di dalem court niyh.. pas pertama ke loketnya, puji Tuhan gw ktemu sama penjaga yg nice gt... pas lg liat" tiket gw n proses paperwork.. dia tiba" nanya gt.. "Ash Wednesday today??" yah gw bilang iyaaaa... then pas dah kelar smua urusan paperworknya.. dia kasitau gw suruh masuk ke court n sidang bakalan dimulainya jam 8an gt... dan trakhir dia blg.. "Thanks for reminding me the Ash Wednesday, so I remember that i have to go to the church tonight". Maaannn... dari sini gw jg blajar gt.. praise God td gw ke greja dulu.. senggaknya mungkin ini juga His plan kalo dari situ gw bisa jadi reminder bwat satu jiwa ini... sambil masuk ke courtnya, yg keinget di gw udah bukan takut lagi, tapi malah keyakinan gw bahwa smuanya bakalan lancar sih karena at least udah satu orang gw temuin ramah gt... nunggu di dalemnya mayan lama sampe nama gw dipanggil... org" yg sebelom gw ditanya"in mayan lama, ada yg kayaknya kasusnya mirip gw gt dan dia kena lebi dari $1500... yg ada sih gw panik, cuman yah gw pasrah ajah... anyway dah ga bisa ngapa"in lagiii... pas nama gw dipanggil, judgenya nanya nama gw trus dia malah blg.. "Can i call u Stefannie?" yah gw blg... "sure"... trus dia nanyain apa gw punya US driver license apa gaaa, bgitu gw blg punya.. dia lgsg bilang "This case is dismissed" even sampe polisi yg jagain disitu mo nyebutin no DL gw, kayaknya ama judgenya dah dicuekin gituuu... trus the second case was about the proof of insurance... dia nanya apa gw punya ato ga.. yah gw blg punya, tapi kan berhubung itu tanggalnya stelah accident, jadinya dia ngulang pertanyaannya apa gw punya proof of insurance sebelom tgl accident ituhhh... mannnn..disini gw perang batin.. kalo gw ngaku guilty it means gw harus bayar ratusan dolar, kalo gw blg not guilty.. gw bisa ngurusin paperwork boongan gituh n maju lg 45 days after that court date, karena sbenernya gampang ajah sih kalo mau boong" gitu... beberapa detik sih gw perang batin apa yg mesti gw jawab niyh, mo blg guilty or not guilty.. ehhh pas ditengah" gw mikir gituhh, polisi yg dideket gw tiba" nanya ke gw "Is today Ash Wednesday?" hmmm.... yah gw bilang iya siyh... dan dari sini gw lgsg diingetin lagiii.. hari ini tuh Rabu Abu, masa loe dah mo bikin dosa lagi sihhh kalo boong" gitu... langsung meskipun i know the consequences, gw blg kalo gw guilty n judgenya nyebutin denda yg harus gw bayar...

Udah kelar urusan courtnya... gw kluar masi dalam keadaan bingung... bingung knapa koq tadi gw bilang guilty.. kalo dipikir secara manusia, kayaknyaaa geblek bgt gitu pake ngaku, padahal itu gampang bgt bwat boong n gw ga perlu bayar apa"... tapi sambil jalan gw doa n gw dapet pengertian bahwa bwat jadi sempurna itu harus bayar harga... dalam hal ini emg financial, tapi disini juga gw ngerasa iman gw diuji... n i just felt joy and peace.. gw ngerasa kalo i did something good ajah gituuu... at least hari ini juga gw boleh ingetin satu jiwa bwat ke greja, that was enough for me too...

Yes Lord, here i am to be purified more and more till the time You can see Yourself in me...